My Pictorial of my Day at the ZOO with Commentary of Course!

Okay, so there are a few things you should know before you move forward: 

 #1 I HATE animals, it's just true, write PETA or PITA and tell them I not care! 

#2 My co worker LOVES animals and knows a lot of dumb facts about them, I have to keep her from petting street dogs and cats so this was a true act of love and sacrifice to take her to the Zoo

 #3 Once you've been to Africa on a legit Safari and seen lions in the wild, a cheetah chase down a gazelle and rip it apart before your very eyes, and had to put your vehicle in reverse because the mommy elephant was not happy you were getting too close to her baby elephant, you are ruined for zoos FOREVER!! 

#4 However, if you're going to the Zoo, International Zoos are the way to go and I have to say Chiang Mai Zoo is nothing to sneeze at unless you're allergic to animals and all things outdoors like myself! What makes them so much better? How do I put this?  I think it's a lack of safety regulations, like if you WANT to stick your finger in and pet the tiger it's totally doable! 

To start the day off, there was this really cool sign I think it's translated: if you're old and wrinkled or a cute little girl you get a discount

Then you pass the pink flamingos, normally a pink flamingo in the front yard screams TRASHY or TACKY or WHITE TRASH (We can still say that one right?!) I mean last I checked it's okay to bash whites and Christians and it not be considered a hate crime right?! Wow! Where did that come from? But live pink flamingos in the front yard are CLASSY, COOL even, but I did feel real bad for this ugly duckling in the front! I hope he has a great personality and good sense of humor!

Like I said, she wants to pet ALL the animals and thanks to the international zoo standards, she gets to pet this Lemur, but I'm pretty sure he wasn't thrilled about it!        
Then we got to hold the birds! He nibbled on my ear! I was NOT thrilled!

It's totally normal for elephants to hang out behind my bamboo posts right?

Here  she goes again with the petting!
While the safety standards are a bit subpar, they are serious about NOT smoking! The penalty is time with the lion.  However, it's no so offensive in the Outback part of the zoo and you get rewarded with Koala time if you engage in smoking!

I almost bummed one off the rude British guy in front of me because seriously how cute is this guy!?
 
You see the TWO lizards?  One has sense to use sunscreen and sit in the shade, the other is going to be needing some aloe at the end of the day! It's common sense guys, it's a jungle out there!

This pretty pretty peacock better be so glad it rained on my mama when we came to the zoo because she would've had all his tail feathers in her suitcase bound for our Christmas tree!

I will admit I could have watched the monkey's all day! And if you've ever wondered what a woman scorned sounds like press play on the video below!

Okay, so I couldn't resist his cuteness. Notice what's standing between me and him, NADA! I captured this great lil cameo of Gratiana's head shot! 
And I'll admit I think that the penguins are pretty cool and kind of can't wait till they open the arctic exhibit because they're going to have cold weather penguins and a polar bear!

This is a southern elephant, he's drinking straight from the hose pipe! I wish I had it on video because when the guy tried to order him to give it back to him, the elephant just kept turning away from him and kept on drinking! I secretly love it when the animals don't do what the trainers say. I mean what's more entertaining watching tigers jump thru hoops or grab a man's head in his jaws?!

About those safety regulations! haha! Seriously, could have gotten a bear hug! And he was super cute I mean for an animal!

And last, but not least my favorite pic of the day, a tribute to all my tired mommy friends, which is unfortunately not clear at all, but see this sweet mama monkey breast feeding the lil baby monkey?  Her eyes are closed and she looks worn all out! The male monkey goes off to do a lil swinging and she let him know with some hollering and some arm swinging of her own that she was NOT happy!  Unfortunately I was far too enthralled with her look of exhaustion and irritation to catch it all on video!  Come see me and I'll take ya to the zoo!

Oh the Places They'll Go!

I've always loved working with young people! ("always" meaning on the average day, some days youth ministry, counseling, and leading interns gave me a run for my money, I can admit that! and "young" meaning people under 30 like myself!)   There's just so much LIFE and POTENTIAL and excitement, the possibilities for their futures are endless!

I'll be the first to admit that when Convoy of Hope decided to shut down their internship program that I was bummed, angry, sad, disappointed, and a bit lost and confused.  I LOVED doing life with those interns, watching them soak up life lessons, and Jesus, and new cultures, missions, and watching them give until hurt!

Being a missionary to Thailand was never on my radar, especially not without young adults in tow! I was always taught never to do ministry alone, you should always have a "Timothy" along with you learning and replicating.  Plus, what on earth would I fill my time with without 20 interns in tow?! (Naps, movies, hanging with friends that I don't have to count when we get into a vehicle to go home, some more questionable adventures that I just couldn't bring myself to do because the possibility of having to notify someone's family that their kid died while crawling across a dilapidated rope bridge over a raging river!)  Needless to say I've figured it out to a degree!  But it's still part of my DNA, I still wish my chickens, my sweet lil minions were here with me.

A few weeks ago, myself and some fellow missionaries went to visit a new university that has over 20,000 students in its first year! It was bigger than any school I've ever seen.

In the near future, we are hoping to start an English center and church here. We spent the morning doing a prayer walk around the campus.  I ventured in and out of the dining area that was buzzing with students, I peeked in class rooms to see that Thai college students aren't much different than American students, as there were a couple sleeping, several on Facebook, or texting on their phones, and some were even engaged in learning! 
 






Like most places here in Thailand, the classroom is a place where you discard your shoes outside the door before walking in! I actually LOVE that part of the culture here because it means I get to teach and sit in church barefoot! The only thing better could be wearing my cowboy boots!  Even though it's a sight I see everyday now, I was struck by all their shoes.

I kept thinking about Dr. Seuss' , "Oh the places You'll Go!"
Here's an excerpt from the good Dr. , but if you have time google it and read the whole thing!

You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes
You can steer yourself
any direction you choose.
You're on your own.  And you know what you know.
And YOU are the guy who'll decide where to go.

On the one hand I am so excited for them because they have so much ahead of them and on the other hand they have SO MUCH ahead of them!  So many choices to make, so many roads to navigate, and so many mountains to climb.

Life is hard; life without the help and hope of Jesus; I shudder at the thought!



I see all their shoes lining every hallway and stairway and I know statistically speaking over 95% of them do not know Jesus. I sigh at the thought, but hope fills my soul as I think about the coming English center and church or churches to follow, I think about the feet that will fill these shoes learning of Christ and choosing to follow Him and oh the places they'll go, the people they will take Him to! I immediately think of the verse that says, "how beautiful are the feet of those who bring Good News," and get excited that some of the shoes in front of me could belong to such feet. The Lord shifts my gaze to my own feet in my Yellow Box flip flops, I crinkle my toes at His imply, it may be the only time I've ever wished for bigger shoes.

I realized then that Thailand was not just a "blip" on the radar of my life and that I may never have another blonde "Timothy" in tow, but how beautiful would a long line of dark hair and brown eyes be when I stand before the Lord? I LOVE my students and hope that when you pray for me that you will pray for them!

This time the Lord didn't send me WITH young people, but TO young people and Oh the Places They'll Go!

"I hope he picks me up!"

I'm not sure what has spurred this post on, a number of things I think, of which teaching English would not be at the bottom of the list.  Parents if you ask your kiddos what they want to be when they grow up and they say, "An ESL teacher!" (English Second Language) then you need to help them RIGHT NOW begin to hone their charades and Pictionary skills because a lot of days that's what I do in both my elementary teaching and my university teaching! You're welcome students!

We've also determined that our students at TLC should probably specify if they want to speak Northern English or Southern English as these are obviously two different dialects! No worries my students will be fluent in southern before my term is up here! Complete with the knowledge of what GBO means, the ability to sing Rocky Top, how to appropriately use the term ya'll, the word soda is only used when preceded by the term baking, and the term pop is something that happens to your behind or mouth if you use any of the words on the No Fly List, coke makes the world go round, and that thing you put your groceries is in is most definitely a buggy! You're welcome America. 

I think there are things we say that we have no idea what they mean. Myself and a couple other missionaries were taking the Harvard Dialect Survey and the question was what do you say when it's raining outside and the sun is shining! Myself and my Alabama colleague said without missing a beat, "The devil's beating his wife!" Our Texas counterpart was appalled and wanted to know why we said such a thing. We shrugged and defensively replied, that's just what it means! 

One time I was telling my California friends about keeping someone's kids. Grabbing their kiddos a little tighter they looked at me puzzled and a bit horrified. Evidently if you keep someone else's kids in California it means kidnapping?! Where I come from it means babysitting! (California Criminals!)

We missionaries especially AG missionaries (Assemblies of God) definitely have our own lingo, just listen to any MK (missionary kid) talk about kicking their STL (Speed the Light) truck into 4wd and using the snorkel to cross a river to get to a village, or how when BGMC (Boys & Girls Missionary Club) sent them the new projector for the church and their parents put a sheet on the wall and used it to let them watch movies! 

I never think too much about it until I make a statement to a friend like, "I'm having lunch with a pastor today I hope he picks me up!" 

Depending on the friend they could think many things:

You want the pastor to physically pick you up off the ground. (Creepy)

You want the pastor to hit on you like with pick up lines. (Creepier)

You want the pastor to pick up the tab. (Not as creepy and likely truth, but not the meaning)

You are depressed and want the pastor to encourage you. (Maybe not Creepy, but definitely needy)

I don't really know why we say it, but when a missionary says they want a pastor or someone else to pick them up, they mean support them monthly financially.  Which I guess, in a way,  could mean many of the above: physically move me to the nation of my calling, pick up the tab, and encourage me by helping me get to where my heart is! But definitely NOT the pick up lines, ew!
Disclaimer :Unless he's cute and single and has a heart for missions and then the pick up lines are welcomed.

Sooo if you'd like to PICK ME UP:  CLICK HERE

My SIL wrote a blog this week about stuff my niece says, my favorite was when she evidently told my brother to, "Sit down!" and her mother yelled from another room, "Niah, we don't demand people to do things, what do we say?"  And Niah whispered to Matthew, "I not say please!" hahahahah! So proud!

But another was when her lil brother was crying in the floor and Niah went to him and said, "It's okay, don't cry, Mommy will probably come pick you up!" (Not sure where the probably comes in, I mean maybe my SIL often lets that sweet little boy cry in the floor unattended to, who knows, but Niah at least had some faith that Cara would indeed pick him up!) Which is what we all need sometimes when we find ourselves lying in the floor crying, to be picked up!!!

I can't help but be grateful on this first day of November, for all those who have picked me up with monthly support and made it possible for me to be here in Thailand.  For the friends whose photos line my walls who pick me up with prayer and encouraging words and silly texts.  For my family, who often picks up the tab for me and who I know I can count on to pick me up

out of any hole I might dig.  But ultimately for my savior who has picked me up time and time again when I've fallen, when I've been knocked down, or when I've just laid down in defeat. Countless times, He's picked me up. Praying for each of you that have picked me up in any way, that He'll do this for you today. Thankful!

Isaiah 41:10
"For do not fear for I am with you, do not be dismayed for I am your God. I will strengthen you, Yes, I will help you, I will uphold you (pick you up :)) with my righteous right hand."

From the Heart of Bess: When Niah Prays

 I can't believe she's almost 2.5 and this is the first blog entry with her as the subject! She calls me Bess and I love it! She can totally say my full name correctly, but this has been her choice, I've even chuckled when she's corrected her Daddy, when he says, Mary Beth, she says, "No, Bess!"  

Over the summer I was visiting these cutest kids in the world (I'm NOT biased, I'm very well traveled & seen thousands of kids therefore this is a statement based on much research and therefore fact) I stepped off a curb and before my foot ever hit the ground something popped and waves of pain and nausea swept over me! Niah was on one side and her cousin Kyah was on the other so I was trying NOT to cry or teach either of the lil parrots any new words and trying NOT to throw up! Niah began to cry because she knew I was hurt and Kyah just kept saying, "Be careful! Be careful! and patting my back!"  Niah is super sensitive to other people's feelings so she was a bit frantic and kept saying, "Daddy pray!" Matthew said, "Niah pray!" And then they did.  Her prayer went a little something like this, "Jesus, Bess foot, amen." 

I have to say it STILL hurt, but Bess was brave and we went on about our business.  The next morning Niah's great G'ma Chickie asked me at church how my foot was, before I could answer, Niah said, "It's okay, Niah pray!" I mouthed silently, "It still hurts a little!" 

I drove back to Springfield went to a Cardinals game with my roommate all the while walking on the foot which by this time was twice the size and a nice purple color, but it didn't hurt.  My boss told me I needed to go to the doctor, so I did, after doing tests he tells me I've ruptured my Achilles and torn a couple of ligaments and wants to know what kind of pain medicine I want.  I said, "It doesn't hurt!"  He said, "Yes it does!"  I said, "No it doesn't."  He said, "It has to, what do you want?" I said, "My two year old niece prayed for it, so I'm guessing that's why it doesn't hurt!"  He snarkily replied, "Whatever helps you sleep at night," and handed me a script for pain meds, which I never had filled, and fitted me for a brace, which I think I wore twice, it didn't really go with any of my sandals!

If you asked me the hardest thing about being a missionary, for the past 2.5 years it's been being away from Miss Sassy Pants and now her chunky lil brother Malachi who pretty much just smiles all the time! Before they were born, I guess my answer would've been not being a good squatter and bed bugs! 

As much as I'd love to head home and open up my own private therapy practice in Niah's new play house, I rest easy knowing that's not where I'm needed at all. Jesus is the center of their home and she gets it! Her first instinct in time of trouble and fear was to pray! When Niah isn't excitedly telling me about her day, or sticking both fingers in her nose, or showing me her shoes, (I'm confident this happens EVERY Face Time conversation we have!), or telling me what her lil brother is doing, she's quoting her most recently memorized scriptures or telling me how much fun she had with her "friens" at church! She's safe, loved, very well fed (just ask her what she had for breakfast when you see her IF you have time for her very detailed list! "Umm.. I have pancakes, eggs, bacon, toast, fruit, some of daddy's chocolate chip pancakes!" and her play house may or may not have more square footage than my current dwelling! But best of all Jesus is the center of her lil world, half the places I've been since she & her brother were born lacked all the things she has; safety, love, food, and the knowledge of where to turn in times of trouble or fear! Where I currently dwell Jesus not only isn't the center, but He's practically unknown.  So, for now, we'll face time and talk about boogers and shoes and breakfast and bows! And laugh! My luggage will be filled with gifts for her and her brother and my heart will be filled with peace that while I'm sharing Jesus here, she's surrounded by Jesus there! 

Bess loves you Niah!

10 NOT so Great Things about Driving a Motorcycle in Thailand

1.  Rain.  Even sprinkles hurt at 100kph (my friend told me) Also, no one looks cool in a poncho.

2.  Being behind garbage trucks, cattle trucks, and pig trucks.  Did you know when animals are in the back of big trucks, they get scared, like they're being taken to slaughter or something, and they potty a lot!? It stinks!

3.  Being behind concrete trucks, loose gravel trucks, pretty much anything that could be carrying loose particles of any kind.  They HURT!

4.  Thai parking lots, a.k.a. where ever they stop in the street.  Need to run into a store?  No problem, park in the lane and turn your flashers on while you shop or don't turn your flashers on, whatever.  Also, when they use the shoulder for parking the driver's door is going to open to the street side sooo seriously watch out!

5.  The A/C just plain stops at stoplights and works rather poorly under 50kph.

6.  Helmet head! Sometimes my head is soaked by the time I arrive somewhere! So that hope of meeting Mr. Southern, Short, Tan, and Handsome in Thailand is greatly diminished when I'm soaked in sweat upon arrival to any and all destinations. I was trying to order a Starbucks the other day and the guy taking my order said, I'm guessing you want something COLD?! I like to be told I look hot, but I don't think this was a pick up line!

7.  Giving an accidental stop light concert.  Ear buds are in and music is at 100% volume so I can hear it over the roar of the traffic so I sing at 100% volume too! Unfortunately, the roar of the traffic stops at stoplights and my motorcycle gang compadres at the head of the line with me get to hear NOT my music at 100%, but my singing!

7.5 Going deaf because of the 100% volume.

8.  Speed bumps! Sometimes ya see em sometimes ya don't, but you always FEEL them! Sometimes flying off the seat in a forward motion is kind of fun like when your bum gets lifted up out of the seat on a roller coaster, it's the coming back down part that's a real downer!!! Punny?

9.  When you have to go to the bathroom! We can all recall a time when we had to go real bad and we're on the road and there's just no restroom in sight so every bump and turn becomes a challenge and your friend starts singing TLC's Waterfalls or talking about leaky faucets or something more offensive.  Well intensify that by the start and stop of CANAL street which gets it's name because of the Canal running down the middle of it, as well as, feeling not just every bump and turn, but every pebble AND you're needing to use your core muscles as well as other muscles to hold the bike up right so they're not as useful for holding anything else! It's just a lose, lose situation.

10.  Bicycles! Dear cyclist, there is no bike lane, and if there was it would be for motorbikes not for YOU! Unless you can accelerate to faster than the speed I am going when you pull out in front of me or when you're riding with your buddies 3 bikes wide, then you should NOT get in front of me! Also, man who was weaving between my bike and a car and began to wobble, reaching out and grabbing me was not the appropriate reaction as you nearly gave me a heart attack. Also, it's super hot here in Thailand, I'm guessing from your short tight shorts that you're European, it's cooler there and I don't think the traffic is so bad either. Bike on back!

10 Great Things about Driving a Motorcycle in Thailand

1. Stop Lights.  Bikes go to the immediate front of all lines. And you all KNOW it was your favorite day of kindergarten when you got to be the line leader.

2. Cool Factor.  All the cool kids do it! Duh! And you know how I said all the bikes go to the front of the line.... so when I'm up at the front revving my lil engine with like a dozen other bikers it's kind of like I'm in a motorcycle gang!!!  Except the other night, I was up front all by myself and I start to hear this roar of engines behind me, like REAL engines. I thought it was a big truck, nope it was a REAL Harley Davidson motorcycle gang, with Pure Thailand bedazzled on the back of leather vests, before I knew it I was surrounded.  It would've made a great photo for Highlights, "One of these things is not like the others" section.

3.  Lanes do not apply to me - at all! Left lane AND Right lane moving slow, well down the middle I go! No room? No problem! Outside that yellow line was created with me in mind!

4.  Great AC at 50kph and above.

5.  Parking! I fit almost anywhere!

6. Gas mileage or is it kiloage?  It takes $3 bucks to fill up my tank ($4 if I forget a few days past red) and I can go for weeks!

7.  Stop light convos.  Pull up next to your friend at each stoplight and ask how their day is going or if you have bugs in your teeth or high five them for running over that cat back there!

8.  All lights are relatively green. For instance,  the light is red because cars are turning from the intersection, but I'm driving outside the yellow line anyway, therefore the light is relatively green and I need not stop.

9.  The Asia Pacific sun, the beautiful mountains, the wind in your hair, and the adrenaline that comes from knowing death could happen at any moment if the car in front of you stops short or the beer truck beside you loses a case causing you to skid into oncoming traffic, or if you resist the turn and end up under the bike instead of on it! It's all very exhilarating!

10. If you forget you're in a nation that drives on the left instead of the right, bobbing and weaving is much easier on a bike than in car! (A friend told me this!)

Standing for the King

I recently had an afternoon off here in Thailand. I was a bit stir crazy and a bit homesick so I thought I'd have an American day. I headed off to the mall to have some quiet time with Jesus & my new Bethel worship CD at Starbucks and also to see the new JOBS movie.

Just a few nights before I had gone to the Walking Street Market with some friends to find some post cards to send Thank You notes to all you wonderful supporters back home.  I was twirling the display looking at the cards when my friend touched my arm and shook her head and motioned for me to be quiet.

Walking Street is loud and bustling except for these two minutes.  I remember being fascinated by it my first trip last fall, EVERYONE stops in place, EVERYONE is silent, and respectful.  It's unbelievable really.  Over the loud speakers their national song a tribute to their king is playing.

The mall is loud and bustling too, thank God for headphones.  JOBS was playing in English so I figured as an all things apple user I should check it out.  Ashton does an EXCELLENT job, my disappointment in the movie was not his fault by any means. Don't get me wrong it was worth the $5.50 I paid to see it.  It's just... well... I don't know how to say this, it was somewhat depressing.  Sure it was fascinating to see how five guys in a garage ultimately changed the world, I mean I passed a sweet MAC store on my way to the theater & I'm in Chiang Mai.  I can iMessage and Face Time for FREE anyone in the WORLD who has an iPhone! Here's where I should start singing, "I love technology!" With an added verse of thanks to Steve Jobs and all those at Apple Inc! I'm not a Steve Jobs hater, but his biography made me sad. It appears he was a very Godless man, focused, brilliant, and self centered, a man who betrayed all those guys who labored with him in his parent's garage, a man who left an amazing mark on this world and changed the way we communicate, learn, listen to music, and so much more, but forgot where he came from or worse yet I'm not sure he ever knew Where he came from.  JOBS is part of our American, well, WORLD history,  but I left sad.

But before the movie started, before ANY movie starts in Thailand, there's another two minute moment of awe.  A video tribute to the king of Thailand is played.  Everyone puts down their pop corn, stops their chatter, and stands and quietly pays tribute and shows respect to their beloved king.

They take moments in the hustle and bustle of their shopping and before they indulge in entertainment to stand for the king. It is not controversial or only practiced by some. It's refreshing. It's moving. It's inspiring. Their diligence, their respect, the way they honor him, his picture is hung all over, and nothing is to be hung higher than his image.  Each piece of paper currency has his picture on it, therefore you do not wad your money up.  The way they speak of and honor voluntarily, the way they are protective of his image and his name, a Thai person would take great offense if anyone were to speak ill of, complain about, or question the king. The way they present him and speak of him and honor him, makes me want to know him, makes me want to stand for the king as well. I can't help, but relate all these things to my own King and hope that the way I speak of Him, honor Him, and present Him, makes others want to know Him and stand for Him too.  Thank you Thai people for sharing your king and making me want to stand for him, I hope you will one day want to stand for my King too.

One day.... every knee will bow and every tongue confess.

Here's a tribute video they were showing earlier this year.  The one they're showing currently is excellent though, so I'll try and snag it next time I take an American day!