Wednesday, April 10, 2013

But Your Front Office Lady Is A B/!?@$?%?^?!!

Some time ago, I had decided that I would write a book.  The title would be, "But Your Front Office Lady is a B@!#&!"  I've since decided that I don't want my legacy to include the B word, but recent events have warranted that this title at least be used for a blog post!!! (Sorry Mom!)

I'm throughly convinced that many businesses and (cough, cough) ministries would profit from such an understanding.  An understanding that whoever the first point of contact is for your organization IS your reputation.  Whether it's by telephono or walking in the front door, "____________ IS First Baptist, JCPenney, Cox Hospital, etc." So, put the name of your secretary, your receptionist, your doorman, your scheduler, whoever in that blank and they ARE your organization! Are you rethinking that minimum wage?  

I once was a front office lady, in case you didn't already know it, that was a BAD idea. I am type A, I am task oriented. I'm not a, "Hey how are you today?" kind of gal! I'm a, "What do you need? Get to the point!" Kind of girl. I'm not an, "It's okay that you can't clearly read the form that says, YOU DO NOT NEED TO FILL THIS PART OUT, YOUR CARDS WILL BE SCANNED, but thanks for telling me that I have them so you can't fill that part out because you don't have that 28 digit account number memorized!" kind of gal!  I don't exude warmth and friendliness although I've learned to fake it a great deal. Ahhh I just scream PASTOR, MISSIONARY, THERAPIST! Don't I? (Oh and P.S. I was eventually an EXCELLENT front office lady, because I realized NICE resulted in pastries and flowers and gift cards from our patients!)

Your front office lady isn't getting any flowers?!?  Maybe it's because she's a B!@$%#!?  ORRR maybe it's because you've got the wrong butt in that chair! OR because you've given her a million and one TASKS to do and those darn PEOPLE keep coming or calling in so she's frustrated and overwhelmed and her voice and face show it and all the sudden the buzz is, "Auto Zone is RUDE or better yet, "You do NOT want to go to First Assembly!" 

Recently I found myself in need of going to the doctor, a.k.a. going broke.   (PS. If people are calling to make a doctor's appointment they probably already aren't having the best day. OR the same could be said if people are calling to speak to the pastor or in Auto Zone, etc.) 

Here's the transcript of my convo with Cruella De Ville or Front. Office. Lady.
 F.O.L. Who is your doctor?  Me: I don't know. I've only been there twice. F.O.L. You don't know who your doctor is?! (said in a tone that really said, you're really so stupid you don't know who your doctor is?!) Me: no. I've only been there 2x and I've never seen different people each time. F.O.L. You've been here 3x. Your doctor is Dr. Plastow and he's not in today and you have a balance so you couldn't schedule anyway. Me: Could I see someone else?  F.O.L. Not until you make arrangements to pay your bill. Me:  Okay. Can I pay it now?  F.O.L. I don't take payments. Me:  Could you transfer me to someone who does? (Bill paid, transfered back to F.O.L. Me:  Can I make an appointment now?  F.O.L:  We don't have any left for today. What did you need to be seen for?  Me: Shortness of breath. (I have pneumonia) F.O.L. Well we could get you in at 3:30, but you have to pay first......

I'm looking for a new doctor because I don't need that kind of hassel when I'm already not feeling well. And I had a balance because they wrongly billed for a well visit which my insurance doesn't cover & it was a sick visit and it had to be refiled! But it wasn't the admin mistake that riled me up it was most certainly the F.O.L. 

Dear HR, Don't worry so much about the typing and worry more about the tone. I realize we Type A people are more efficient and just overall more excellent workers than those socialites, but find a socialite, find a nice sweet ole g'ma to answer the phone and to greet your patrons, because they're your first impression, they're your reputation, they're who you are! Oh my goodness, I just realized why Wal Mart hires those sweet old people to stand at the front door! 

I'm not sure if it was the pneumonia that spurred this on or the fact that the verse I'm currently memorizing is Philippians 2:5 "In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus!"

(I figured I should end with a verse since I started with the B word!) 


2 comments:

  1. Well, if I were your F.O.L., I would say, "Oh, great. We're gonna get calls after this post." Seriously, the first voice on the phone or first face someone sees connected with a church, ministry or business is the representative of that organization. And, everyone always judges the organization by that first contact whether on the phone or in person. If you want your organization to seem friendly, hire the friendly person to be the first contact with the public. Otherwise, they'll go on down the road to spend money elsewhere or attend church elsewhere.

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  2. HI Mary Beth,
    Love your Blogging! Keep it up!
    Jon Menton from Fresno.

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